tylnapp - Page 25

May I ask how everyone's morning has been thus far..?

Morning Qfeast.

I would like to wish everyone a Goodnight's sleep tonight. To add, I would like to wish anyone pulling an all-nighter tonight the best of luck in their endeavours...today was...interesting...quite different in many ways...both good and bad...I found new lands to govern just beyond the dam, within the slowly growing raging waters of fear...though trudging through those waters leaves....more fears than before...some odd feelings as well that I have only experienced in the past due See More to prolonged use of various devices...but returning to my spot...damp...shaped to my very being...sheltered by my body...though he water...like bayonets affixed on spears launched from the clouds above...each piece of stimuli pounds hard....and many penetrate...leaving a scar that has yet to heal...my fur coat..although matted and soaked...cloaks those very wounds...but I slowly move away from that familiar spot...scooting each day towards the land on the right..where friends and family support...and the shelter for the rain is thin...but better than what is here...Anyways...Goodnight Qfeast, and Goodnight to all of its inhabitants.

May I ask how everyone's day has been thus far..?

Morning Qfeast.

I would like to wish anyone trying to get some sleep for he rest of their night (since for some it maybe a tad bit past nighttime) a Good Rest... To add, if anyone is trying to pull an all-nighter (if it is still night for them), I wish them the best of luck in their endeavours....to...yesterday was...interesting...though not the best at quite a few parts due to...somethings and thoughts...I suppose some thoughts are like a safety rope keeping you from falling over the edge...into See More the raging waters of fear...or the void that is the mind...and space...though it is barbed...and grips tight...on this crumbling dam that separates the raging typhoon of fear against the rest of my mind...as I sit...matted fur, and all paws laying on the rubble covered dam...barbed wire holding me from tipping over either side...but only barely...friends have come to my aid...yelling from the right side...and slowly I shuffle slightly towards it...a better tomorrow...maybe...there is one...Anyways...Goodnight Qfeast, and Goodnight to all of its inhabitants.

I know myself to be less than others, next to trash...yet I value myself in a hypocritical fashion...I loathe my existence as a Human...somewhat...yet I value my own personality over others...part of it is partially in some more appropriate fears one could say...but others are simply for originality...I don't want something to happen...yet I fear I won't get that choice in the matter...a simple tossing of a plastic item into the rubbish bin over my food...the idea of having my See More entire being either degraded slowly...or immediately erased....I suppose one of those things has yet to happen...but...I am not quite sure how....much longer I can go with these constant worries, everyday for the past nearly year now...I know others have these things worse...which is why I don't talk about it in public....often...if at all...hey have more priority over my wellbeing....everyone else does...and I defend those whom I can...but don't quite defend myself...I simply slide to the side...on here and in real-life...Am I truly worth it...? Is this truly worth it..? I've been thinkinng..

I suppose I can count how many people have helped me with...varied, but similar problems...here on Qfeast..Rebel...Reaper...Angel...Won't you stay alive...Soul-san...Queen of Narnia...Callista as she was once known as...and a few others...I thank them for their help...what they could provide, whether in the past or the present...I..head their advice daily...but sometimes forget and find myself teetering on the edge...of an abyss that I cannot climb out of...I know I did a bigger See More hole as I write this...not for my status on Qfeast...for sanity...but for my own fears...maybe sanity then....a simple song lyric can mean...or seem to do anything...or could do something...At this point I am sure if anyone cared to read this far...they think I am either a nut case...have a problem which I agree with if they do say that...don't care but like the read...maybe one of those...I am like a wolf, or a fox on the edge of this mountain of problems...friends and family help me weekly at most or least...but no matter how loud I yip or howl...only they can either hear or care...and only I seem to have these problems...at least in sight....I still dig a steeper hole by writing...typing more on this comment just due to the fact a Japanese song lyric that sounds like no...but went to something else...and means something else was repeated unintentionally as part of a song...yep...I fear what could happen merely due to that...but I'll post this nonetheless...

I suppose I have not been known for one to dwell on...subjects, or blatantly throw my problems in the open on social media...often that often...indications maybe...but often not to the point on what he problem is....I suppose this is...maybe my first...maybe not new...but my post on a..reoccurring problem that I seem to...deal with everyday...Maybe it is TW worthy...probably not...maybe insane...I do not quite know at this point...I have gotten advice and plenty of great support See More from...many Qfeasters and even my family but I know that...only I can really overcome this fear....I have...many fears and phobias surrounding every action...thing I touch...thing I look at...the mere thought of them possibly doing something is terrifying to me...but...the main problem I face is...of whether I can truly stay truly myself...whether I am doomed...destined...whatever you want to call it....to become one of these three outcomes...stay the same mostly...with evolution addons to the original..., change into a copy of someone else...insane...maybe...but I fear of simply becoming someone I don't want to be..., or whether I am not strong enough to basically do anything about it...the possibility of something like (and this sounds insane, but it can happen...using sound, we can affect the way a person thinks...and functions...) the Reapers from ME series...stuck in a husk of a body, he human hosts watch helplessly as they tear apart what hey created...Two of those things I fear everyday...and sometimes think as if I act differently and stress myself out everyday due to it....I don't know how to not worry about every single little thing hat happens in life...sometimes I think about others, and what hey think in a third person perspective....odd...and I do it often actually...but then I worry on simply doing that...

May I ask how everyone's day has been thus far?

May I ask how everyone's morning has been thus far..?

Morning Qfeast.

I would like to wish everyone a goodnight's sleep tonight. To add, I would like to wish anyone pulling an all-nighter...which technically would only be a few minutes from now for most...but it is also a school night for most as well....the best of luck in their endeavours....today was...interesting...filled with times....of triumph where...I moved closer to the land on the right side of this crumbling dam...though the raging waters of fear continue to become increasingly rough...and See More the water level continues to rise as the rain pelts harder each day...the...fear of whether this fur coat...while shielding what's on the outside from the weather...may not stop the waters of fear from seeping into what's on the inside...slowly drowning what's left...somedays are better...but others tip me closer to the edge...which edge I suppose would be the question...towards the waters of fear...or the void that is beyond....Will I survive this...? Will I stay the same...but better..even after different things...? So many questions come to mind as the winds blow harder...but..they are left unanswered...Anyways...Goodnight Qfeast, and Goodnight to all of its inhabitants.

May I ask how everyone's day has been thus far...?

(Sorry for asking so late....I was caught up in some...clan business on a server..)

May I ask how everyone's morning was..?

Morning Qfeast.

I would like to wish everyone a goodnight's sleep tonight. To add, I would like to wish anyone pulling an all-nighter tonight he best of luck in their endeavours....today was...interesting...though now the rains of fear...although in a different direction...pelt as hard as they did before...he unknown of too many things plagues my mind....and threatens to flood it...the dam is crackling underneath my paws...and I do not know how much longer I would be able to hold on. The water See More level of fear rises as the thoughts of...the very things I fear seem to somewhat come true...either that or it seems as if it does when in all reality it is I unintentionally acting different due to the fear...Anyways...Goodnight Qfeast, and Goodnight to all of its inhabitants.