High School Life

Discovering A New Feeling

Dakota said what? The words of him confessing how he felt ringed through out my head. Was it true? Could he be telling me the truth? Leaning against the closed door, I heard his heavy breathing. Clinching my fists, I couldn't understand why he would care about me. I'm nothing. I couldn't even get one guy to care about me. Worse than that, I let myself believe he cared about me.

What an idiot I am. Suddenly, I felt my body moving on its own. My legs stood up from off the floor as my hand reached out to twist the door. Why was I doing this? I don't need anyone! I always fix something on my own, but it always comes with a price. Opening the door, I glared at Dakota with my blood shot brown eyes and sour appearance. I probably look pathetic.

Then, he did something I never thought any guy but my brother would do. Dakota ran at me and wrapped his strong arms around me tight. My body crushed up against him as I felt tears continuing to run down my face.

Thump. Thump.

What was this feeling? Why did my heart beat speed up with just a hug from Dakota? Tears exploded from my eyes as I yelled in pain over what had happened. My trust for other people would be gone from here on out. I would never trust..

"Haven, listen to me. I know you are upset over that.. Jerk. But, I want you to know. I would never hurt you. When I first met you, I thought you were beautiful. I wanted to know everything. Your fears. Your likes. Your dislikes. I know this is pathetic, but I thought something sweet would make you smile." Dakota pulled a little away for me to see his face as his green eyes radiated at me with so much hope.

Dakota. I had been wrong. Zero was a jerk who never cared only used me, but Dakota made me laugh made me happy. "Tha-nk y-ou." I said shuttering still upset over what happened. With a sweet smile, Dakota pulled a hand away and started whipping my tears off of my face.

"Hold on, I have a surprise for you." Dakota ran out the door when I heard him speaking to David. The thought of David upset me even more. I shut him out, but it was normal. I shut everyone out. Looking at my phone while I waited, I felt my heart ache even more. Two text from Zero glimmered on the screen. Opening it up, I read the texts.

"Look Haven, I shouldn't of done what I did. I do care for you, but this feeling has never happened before I don't know how to understand it. Please. Don't believe what David and Dakota say." (First text from Zero)
"I guess I can't get to you. I'll leave you alone." (Second text from Zero)

I gritted my teeth for a minute as more tears ran down my face. In my mind, words of rage covered my rational thoughts. Then, I called down and sent only one word. Jerk. After sending the text, I turned my phone off and threw it at the pile of dirty clothes.

Zero is such a jerk! I'm crying my heart out cause I am hurt after realizing the truth about Zero, and all he can say is he can't understand his feelings! I am not a freaking toy he can play with anytime he wants.

In my fit of rage, I did not noticed Dakota walking in with David's old guitar around him. Staring at his messed up brown hair, I wondered why he did not care how he looked. He seemed so relaxed from the cold side of him I saw today.

Trying to comment about what he was about to do, he strung a string on the guitar. A smile curved on his face as his light green eyes calmed me down even more. "Listen to this. Now, I'm a little rusty, so bare with me." Dakota mentioned getting ready to sing and play. The sweet stringing on the way he was playing soothed the very inside of me. For once today, I was relaxed.

"Somehow I found
A way to get lost in you
Let me inside
Let me get close to you
Change your mind
I'll get lost
If you want me to
Somehow I found
A way to get lost in you."

Dakota stopped after singing that chorus and changed the beat into a totally different song. But, while he was singing that song, I felt my heart beating faster, my skin blushing, and my worries fading away. Dakota's voice was amazing, too. I felt like I was listening to a professional singer. Then, I saw his mouth move again and another beautiful song exploded from his mouth.

"Oh,won't you stay with me?
'Cause you're all I need
This might be love, it's clear to see
So darling, stay with me
Why are you so emotional?
No, it's not a good look, so try a smile, beautiful
And deep down I know this never works
But you can lay with me so it doesn't hurt"
A laugh curved from my happy face as I realized he had changed some of the words from a very good song to make me happy. For some reason, I felt like singing, too. David said I was really good, but I never thought I was. I thought I sucked. When Dakota finished, I clapped my hands fast and loud.
"That was amazing! You were really good." I complimented him as I walked and grabbed the guitar away.
"Are you going to sing?" Dakota smiled sitting beside me on the bed.
"Wait, did I just hear Little Bit might sing?" David ran into the room and placed a seat in the floor and watched.
"Yeah. I'm not good, but I know how to play this song since I've heard it enough." I started playing the beginning to it while I closed my eyes envisioning the thought of Zero in front of me. This song was dedicated to him. Only I would know that.

Zero's Point Of View
Standing in front of the house, I opened the door slightly and walked in. I know I shouldn't be doing this, but I messed up. I was always competitive when it came to Dakota. I always wanted to win, but maybe I should of been worried about Haven's feelings. How could I have been so stupid?
Walking down the hallway, I saw the light to her room on while Dakota and David were no where to be found. Then, I heard it. The strings of the guitar playing to a heart reaching up beat tone. Making sure not to get in front of the door, I stood outside and listened. I thought my ears were lying to me, but I heard Haven's beautiful voice ringing through my ears.
I always loved her voice, but the feeling I head right now the emotion surrounded in those words. I couldn't help but know it was my fault when I heard the beginning of the song.
"I tried to find you at the bottom of a bottle
Laying down on the bathroom floor
My loneliness was a rattle in the windows
You said you don't want me anymore

And you left me
Standing on a corner crying,
Feeling like a fool for trying
I don't even remember
Why I'm wasting all these tears on you
I wish I could erase our memory
'Cause you didn't give a damn about me
Oh, finally I'm through
Wasting all these tears on you
These tears on you"

Haven's voice was so beautiful even angels couldn't sing that beautiful but still. I knew why she was singing this song. Every lyric. Every versus.

"You ain't worth another sleepless night
And I'll do everything I gotta do to get you off my mind
'Cause what you wanted I couldn't give
What you did, boy, I'll never forget

And you left me
Standing on a corner crying
Feeling like a fool for trying
I don't even remember
Why I'm wasting all these tears on you
I wish I could erase our memory
'Cause you didn't give a damn about me
Oh, finally I'm through
Wasting all these tears on you
These tears on you"

Each painful heart aching word she beautifully sang was right on point with what she was trying to say. I knew I had made the world's biggest mistake. I thought maybe she would forgive. I was wrong.

"And you left me
Standing on a corner crying
Feeling like a fool for trying
I don't even remember
Why I'm wasting all these tears on you
I wish I could erase our memory
'Cause you didn't give a damn about me
Oh, finally I'm through
Wasting all these tears on you
Oh, oh, these tears on you

I tried to find you at the bottom of a bottle
Laying down on the bathroom floor"

With her final beautiful finishing tone, I stood in front of the door to see her glaring at me with her brown heart broken eyes. Dakota and David were staring at her clapping, but I couldn't make my hands clap together. I saw tears running down her face as she stared at me. I couldn't handle it. Running out the door, I held my hand over the place on my chest that hurt. I screwed up. Now, I lost her.


DARKANGEL HERE! I own none of the songs sang in this chapter! :)