Why I Do Not Like Cats

Why I Do Not Like Cats

So many of you have realized that I have a problem with cats. Not like, cartoon cats like Happy, or RoseHeart's cats because they are my biffles. :3 But other cats. I hate them. And many of you will hate me for it. So I'm making a story to explain why I have a problem with cats. Plus a bonus chapter on why I think Boo The World's Cutest Dog is ugly! Plus the picture is something my grandfather has on his Christmas stocking. We like to put buttons and pins on them, mine is currently in a suit of armor.

published on November 19, 2014completed

3000 Characters!?!

3000 Characters!?!
Well this is annoying but I need 3000 so...


Don't get me wrong when you hear my song
There's never been a guy liked animals more
I'd do anything for a feather or a fin
Say 'hi' to my friends at the zoo now and then

I like cows and pigs, ducks and geese
I could live with a goat or a hog
Of course I like a horse and I care for a bear
I could even help save a wolf, whale or a hare
I like dogs and frogs, fish and snails
I even like a little mouse
There's squirrels and worms, mooses and bugs
I've even had a snake and a lizard in the house

But I hate cats

They go around purrin' and drop all their fur in your oatmeal

I hate cats

They sneak around your house and they claw up your couch
And in the alley, they lick dead rats
And if you kiss 'em 'cause they're cute,
It makes me wanna puke; you've got rat germs on your face

I hate cats

They knock down your plants
They have kittens on your pants in the closet

I hate cats

Y'know, I wouldn't really mind a tiger or a lion
But you can take your plain old cat
And all your kitty litter and cans of chopped liver
and throw them in a gunnysack

I hate cats

They make you sneeze and you start to wheeze
And they always have a lot of fleas
So, if you wouldn't mind, would you take your feline
and leave it at that, 'cause I hate cats (Stavro Arrgolus)
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Comments (2)

I like cats, but this is just hilarious.
★★★★★! :D
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on November 20, 2014
i agree on all of this
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on November 20, 2014