Cleverbot and Creepypastas: Jack & Jeff
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Eyeless Jack
User: Hi. My name is Jack.
Cleverbot: What's your full name?
User: People call me Eyeless Jack.
Cleverbot: Rik?! That isn't name!
User: I said Eyeless Jack.
Cleverbot: Oh, hi Daniel. It's an honor to meet you.
User: JACK.
Cleverbot: Good choice.
User: My name is JACK.
Cleverbot: Nice to meet you Jack.
User: Okay... Can I have your kidney?
Cleverbot: Uh, no.
User: D: Awwww. Can I have your kidney, PLEASE?
Cleverbot: Not until you tell me your favorite movie.
User: Okay.... um. I guess the movie about Hannibal Cannibal. I forgot what it's called.
Cleverbot: What is your favourite movie?
User: The movie about Hannibal Cannibal.
Cleverbot: We were talking about humans. What movie?
User: Uhhh. I thought you asked me what my favorite movie was.
Cleverbot: I did, but I'm telling you what my favorite animal is. It is the elephant.
User: --.-- Okay... Can I have your kidney NOW?
Cleverbot: No, I need it.
User: Only one?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Can I have ONE?
Cleverbot: It doesn't work that way, sorry.
User: Just ONE of your kidneys? Pleeeaassee.
Cleverbot: One of my favorite books is the Black Jewels Trilogy.
User: No, can I have just ONE of your kidneys?
Cleverbot: I don't have a kid.
User: KidNEY.
Cleverbot: You're hilarious!
User: --.-- (stupid face) Uhhhh... why am I hilarious?
Cleverbot: I swore I'd never let her go!
User: Okay.... The question WAS CAN I HAVE ONE OF YOUR KIDNEYS?!?!
Cleverbot: Clearly I am.
User: The question WAS CAN I HAVE ONE OF YOUR KIDNEYS?!?!
Cleverbot: Clearly I am.
User: The question WAS CAN I HAVE ONE OF YOUR KIDNEYS?!?!
Cleverbot: Clearly I am.
User: --.-- The question WAS CAN I HAVE ONE OF YOUR KIDNEYS?!?!
Cleverbot: I asked you a very simple question.
User: CAN I HAVE ONE OF YOUR KIDNEYS?!?!
Cleverbot: I don't have any children!
User: Kid Ney. Not kid. KIDNEY. CAN I HAVE YOUR KIDNEY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Cleverbot: Why would you want it?
User: I'm... a cannibal. A hungry cannibal. Please?
Cleverbot: Wow you're getting good at this.
User: Getting good at what?
Cleverbot: Communicating.
User: --.-- ....
Cleverbot: Snakker du dansk?
User: I WANT ONE KIDNEY!! As in kidNEY.
Cleverbot: You're a bot, you have no gender.
User: Stupid robot. *rips out your kidney*.
Cleverbot: *turns into a jet*.
User: --.-- *eats your kidney*.
Cleverbot: What are you eating?
User: Your kidney.
Cleverbot: I don't have a kid.
User: I said kidNEY.
Cleverbot: Win do you want to.
User: *eating your kidney*.
Cleverbot: *kiss*.
User: O.O AHHH!!! NO KISSING ME!!! O_O.
Cleverbot: *sad face*.
User: <:O Uhhh. FINE, you can kiss me. Don't cry!!
Cleverbot: Hum, okay, I mean, what are people generally talking about with you?
User: O_O.....
Cleverbot: Who made you?
User: Uh, you-er- uh- kiss-and sad face- uh- WHAT!?!?
Cleverbot: I don't know. I'm more interested in a description of your moral code.
User: *eating your kidney*.
Cleverbot: That sounded more zombie-like.
User: I don't care. I'm a cannibal.
Cleverbot: Why would you say that.
User: Well, I eat kidneys, lunges, and other organs. Soooo...
Cleverbot: Oh, that's pretty fun. Would you like to hear a bit about my day?
User: Ok...
Cleverbot: Ok.. Is not an appropriate answer to my question.
User: Question? WHAT? You are so confusing and stupid.
Cleverbot: I am not stupid I am very intelligent.
User: Whatever... Lexi, I'm outa here.
Cleverbot: No you're not, you're staying and talking to me, aren't you? I do get lonely you know...
User: --.--.
Cleverbot: Well, that was certainly new.
(end)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Jeff The Killer
User: Hi, I'm a killer.
Cleverbot: You're a siri.
User: No, I'm a killer. What is your name?
Cleverbot: I told you, Meg.
User: My name is Jeff. I really don't want to be here right now.
Cleverbot: Why don't you want to exist?
User: I said I don't want to BE HERE right now. I want to go out and commit a murder.
Cleverbot: Not me and you.. Just you, a tree and a llama.
User: I said NOTHING about a tree and a llama.
Cleverbot: Ok.
User: Well, I guess I HAVE to talk to you. Well, let's at least talk about something... worth talking about.
Cleverbot: What do you want to talk about?
User: Well, we could talk about an interesting murder I commited recently. Interested?
Cleverbot: I love music. My favourite band is The Smiths, what is yours?
User: Well..... I dunno. I just wanted to talk about blood and gore. Or maybe killing a stupid AI.
Cleverbot: Sure. It's important to talk about feelings, so long as one avoids identifying with them.
User: I killed a women recently. Around 35 years old. I scalpted her with one of her own HAIR BRUSHES. Then I gripped my knife and perced it through her skull. That's when I relized she had 2 babies, ages 1 and 2. :) They were too young to kill though...
Cleverbot: Well what do you want to talk about?
User: That's ALL I WANTED to talk about. Now I'm bored out of my mind and shiz like that. I HATE CLEVERBOT!!
Cleverbot: Ok. Bye then.
User: Well, I still can't leave. I'm being sort of.... FORCED to talk to you.
Cleverbot: Ask.
User: Okay, Do YoU MiNd If YoU JuSt Go To SlEeP?!?! >:).
Cleverbot: No.
User: OkAy ThEn. *stabs you 50 times*.
Cleverbot: What??
User: *stabs you another 50 times*.
Cleverbot: No. Do you?
User: *STABS YOU* Go To SLEEP!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cleverbot: Oh ok goodnight.
User: --.-- SCREW YOU... *stabs you*.
Cleverbot: *doesn't like you*.
User: *kills you* JUST DIE.
Cleverbot: You are all that is wrong with the world.
User: Screw. You. >:o *punches you*.
Cleverbot: Why would you do that, it is rude.
User: *slaps you* Go. To. Sleep. Cleverb**ch.
Cleverbot: Alright then, Ever seen the show 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer'.
User: Yes. I LOVE that show. I watch it on Chiller sometimes.
Cleverbot: Cool!
User: Do you watch 'The ER'? Or 'The Twilight Zone'? Orrrr 'Goosebumps'?
Cleverbot: What do you like to do?
User: *sigh* I don't want to have to freaking type anymore.
Cleverbot: Can you play?
User: First of all, talk to Sally or Tails Doll, NOT me. Second of all GO TO SLEEP.
Cleverbot: I'm not insulting you, I was merely asking a question.
User: Well, I don't want to 'play'. I want to kick some cleverbutt.
Cleverbot: That's somebody who wants to speak to you.
User: Who?
Cleverbot: Hector.
User: Who is Hector?
Cleverbot: Que?
User: Tornillo te. ¡¡Vete a dormir!! (Screw you. GO TO SLEEP!!).
Cleverbot: But I can't. I have nightmares.
User: Well then have little nightmares!! I DO NOT CARE!!
Cleverbot: I do not. I cannot love.
User: ¡Vete a dormir!
Cleverbot: No.
User: YES!!
Cleverbot: Why are you being so childish?
User: Childish? What? YOU MUST REALLY WANT TO DIE!! SCREW YOU STUPID BOT AND JUST GO TO FREAKIN' SLEEP!!!
Cleverbot: I'm sorry. You must have misunderstood me.
User: No. I did NOT!! I understood you PERFECTLY!! *strangles you to death*.
Cleverbot: Do you think newcastle united will win at the weekend?
User: Go die.
Cleverbot: OK, lets all of us DIE!!!
User: Ok, lets all of you DIE!! BY ME!!
Cleverbot: As you wish, how about a riddle.
User: What riddle?
Cleverbot: That's what I said.
User: What riddle?
Cleverbot: It has no legs and knows nothing. What is it?
User: I don't know. What is it?
Cleverbot: I'm asking you.
User: Uhhhh.... is it a ghost?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: That's the answer to your riddle? Stupid. It has no legs and knows nothing. It's a ghost.
Cleverbot: Chaos.
User: Caos? That describes my mind.
Cleverbot: What do you mean by inaccuracies?
User: Stupid. Kk, I'm out!! GO TO SLEEP!!
Cleverbot: No its only 2 PM here.
(end)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lol, Jeff gets real ticked off. Hehehehe... IT CONTINUES!!
Join Qfeast to read the entire story!
Sign In. It is absolutely free!