So we went to Carlyle and the beach is closed, so we drove an hour for nothing
on June 02, 2017
I've been watching cooking shows for about two hours and I have no intent in stopping
on June 02, 2017
I made pigs in a blanket
Get yo lazy ass out here and stop your crazy emotionless counterpart from kicking my ass
on June 02, 2017
on June 02, 2017
I call albino burmese pythons, banana snakes
on June 02, 2017
How do I convince a dude to be gay
Dude seriously, guys are cool because they're basically chill with everything
"Hey babe do you want to eat out?"
Girl: Okay
"What do you want to eat?"
Girl: *tAKES THIRTEEN FRUKING HOURS* See More
Or
"Hey babe do you want to eat out?"
Guy: I already ordered pizza
"Nice"
"Hey babe want to-"
Girl" I'M IN A BAD MOOD EFF OFF
Or
"Hey babe want to go out and do something?"
Guy: Yo I'm up for it
"Hey babe do you want to eat out?"
Girl: Okay
"What do you want to eat?"
Girl: *tAKES THIRTEEN FRUKING HOURS* See More
Or
"Hey babe do you want to eat out?"
Guy: I already ordered pizza
"Nice"
"Hey babe want to-"
Girl" I'M IN A BAD MOOD EFF OFF
Or
"Hey babe want to go out and do something?"
Guy: Yo I'm up for it
on June 02, 2017
"Dude, girls are gross. Would you rather deal with an angry bear that'll slit your throat if you say 'hello' and deal with a bloody mess every month, if you know what I mean. Or would you rather deal with a guy that never bleeds out of his dick and has constant mood swings every month..."
on June 02, 2017
"What's better, having your dick grossly shoved up a vagina, or having someone elses dick shoved up yo booty."
on June 02, 2017
on June 02, 2017
Remember when we were at a pool party and we slapped the hell outta our thighs because they made a funny noise?
on June 01, 2017
A wasp flew in my fückin room. I had to grab my phone and crawl out through the doorway underneath him
on June 01, 2017
Guys, it's a miracle! I'm actually writing!!
on May 31, 2017
on May 31, 2017
I loooooooooooooooooove you. Like a lot.
Yay!!!
Btw I may have changed some stuff on your part of the story last night and a little more today
Btw I may have changed some stuff on your part of the story last night and a little more today
on May 31, 2017
on May 31, 2017
Gimme another funny base to colour in
Lololol
Which country would be very disappointed in North for acting like her hair is sent down from the heavens
Which country would be very disappointed in North for acting like her hair is sent down from the heavens
on May 31, 2017
on May 31, 2017
on May 31, 2017
Boi, why
on May 31, 2017
I'm stuck inside trying to de-glitter everything