BlueTheQuizWhiz97 - Page 369

During grade 4.. I started being bullied by a large group of girls in my class. They would target every little thing about me, shove it in my face. Of course, I was strong. I had a voice in my head looking out for me, giving me advice in the most important moments. "They might be jealous. You shouldnt listen to them, just move on with your life" and thats what I did. (btw i believe its an older me watching over me cause it sounds exactly like that). But one day, my best friend/crush See More disappeared. he had moved far away. I didnt have his phone number, his address, i didnt even know he left until he was gone. the bullies words affected me. I fell into depression at grade 6, age 11-12. It got worse. grade 7, everything was changing. i was still bullied. I got Mercedes, (mouse) and her boyfriend together. oh how that backfired.. she spent so much time with him she started drifting from me. Of course, I didnt say anything. why would I? she seemed happy and i didnt want to be selfish. Then he started insulting me behind her back. I'm sure he thought it was just teasing, but he soon picked my biggest flaw= my nose. Charissa joined him. They insulted me twice everyday, replacing my bullies. At first I would make a comment back, or shove them, or somehting. but as i fell deeper into depression i stopped.. and just stared at them or walked away. This kept going on. The only person I felt I could talk to was Reigha, but.. she stopped supporting me after a month or two. I was alone, completely and utterly. I went emotionless, I got hurt but didnt feel it, I.. I died inside. But all the while I would smile, my arms feeling hot from the cuts. Then i became suicidal. the only thing that kept me going was this one thought.. "If i died they would cry. If i died they would have no shoulder to lean on. I will keep being a tool, and keep helping people with their problems...even if they never helped me" TO THIS DAY i still follow that. thats why im always so supportive. but im not longer severely depressed. any little thing can bring it back though.. if im not careful. Sometimes i go completely still and stare off into the distance. I would hold my throat, stop breathing, and pretend to be dead. Just like I did when I was depressed

HELLO! ANNOUNCEMENT TIME! If anyone and I mean anyone judges, hurts, or insults someone else they arent allowed on here anymore. They are KICKED! you have been warned..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B0bdhgmHCEw&list=RDMM&index=18

Its russian, but I like it. i dunno why

If you enjoy these songs, like it or tell me. I like having the same preferences as my friends personally