Phases of the Moon

Phases of the Moon

The little boy Magik's last memory was his mom tucking him in to bed. Now he is awake and in a strange place he has never seem before. Is he asleep? And what is with the moon?

published on April 12, 2014not completed

Waking Up

Waking Up
Magik: where am I? is that rock getting bigger? who's there? what is this? I'M SO CONFUSED!!! mysterious voice: you are in Halfmoon. The rock is not getting bigger, you are getting smaller. I am your Saviour from the enemies on Halfmoon. There are many. Magik: watch out Saviour! Saviour: AACKK!!! evil aliens: looks like your Guardian is gone doesn't it? Magik: go away! leave me alone!! evil alien: I would advise you to be quiet and do what I say if you want to survive. Saviour: *pulls off sound mask* don't do it Magik! Magik: no. evil alien: then I'll just have to take you as my PRISONER!!! Magik: *runs away* evil alien: 34i get him! 34i: yes sir. *grabs Magik*
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Comments (5)

Good story but a little 2 fast into things.
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on April 13, 2014
(BTW i am following u)
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on April 12, 2014
good story, but needs editing. (look at punctuation, dialogue, and try to explain the escape more) don't worry, it has a good plot-line, so you wont need to work on that too much. if u need my help, i will help you. i edit my stories all the time, and i'm rewriting one of them, so don't feel bad. :p u got this!
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on April 12, 2014
okay. thanks for the feedback! now I will try to make it better in the future ;)
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on April 12, 2014
It's cool but a little too fast-paced. I didn't understand.
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on April 12, 2014