The Boarding School

-2-

I pull out my laptop from under my bed and set it on my lap, turning it on. I look up the website about the boarding school. Not that I want to go, but just to get more info on it, in case Auntie forces me to go or something. But I really don't want to go. I really don't. It doesn't really say anything about it... I sigh and close the tab. I go on facebook and browse the feed, till Auntie calls me down for dinner. I close my laptop and go downstairs. I sit in my normal seat at the dinner table. The table was already nicely set, and everyone sat down.
"I really think Maddie should go to the boarding school, Jack" Aunt Lisa says to my Dad.
"Enough Lisa. Maddie doesn't want to go, and I won't make her" Dad says.
"Alright" she grumps.
"I think she should go too! She can stay away from me!" Ashley jokes.
"Now Ashley, don't say stuff like that. Just finish your dinner" Dad says.
"Maddie fought again at school today" Aunt Lisa says.
"No I didn't" I say quietly.
"Maddie?" Dad says slowly and intimidating.
"It wan't me" I try to say.
"The school called, they said it was you" Auntie says. I stand up and bang my fist on the table.
"It wasn't me! Why won't you believe me?!" I scream and run up into my room. Dad wipes his face with a napkin and slowly stands up.
"I'm going to go talk to here" Dad says quietly to Aunt Lisa. I'm in my room, laying on my stomach on my bed, my face pressed against my pillow. I hear Dad walking up the stairs, I cover my face even more.
"Maddie?" Dad whispers, creaking open the door. I keep my face covered with my pillow and start to sob. He sits down on the edge of my bed and gently pats me on the shoulder.
"Maddie......" He starts. I keep sobbing.
"I promise you won't go to the boarding school, and I believe that you didn't fight at school" Dad says.
"I did" I whisper, my voice shaking.
"What?" Dad asks, rubbing my back with one hand.
"I did fight with someone... She called me ugly multiple times, my rage just sorta grew, and I couldn't stop the urge to punch..." I whisper.
"Maddie, your beautiful. And don't worry about it. Have you tried to stop your anger?" Dad asks quietly, looking down at me.
"I try... But it over-powers me" I cry.
"Okay" Dad whispers, still rubbing my back gently. "It's not your fault, dear, it's... Only a disorder darling, it's alright. They will cure it. Have you been taking your pills?" He says.
"No" I say quietly.
"I won't force you to take them, but I do think it's beneficial to be taking them, darling" Dad says.
"I don't like taking pills, especially those" I say.
"Okay darling... I won't make you" Dad says. "Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?" Dad asks.
"I don't know" I cry. Dad wraps his arms around my shoulders and gently pulls me to sit up, and wipes the tears from my eyes.
"There's gotta be something" Dad says.
"Make Aunt Lisa move out...." I say so quietly he could barely hear me.
"Honey... That's something I can't do right now" Dad says slowly.
"But Dad, she always tries to rat me out, always blaming me for things I've never done, and now she's trying to get me out of the house" I sniffle.
"I will take care of it. I promise, things will get better" Dad says.
"How do you know?" I ask, sniffling, wiping the liquid off my upper lip with my sleeve.
"Because I love you" Dad smiles, wiping more tears off my cheeks.
"But it feels like everyone hates me, its not even my fault. I hate my disorder...." I say quietly.
"I love you, and so does you aunt, sister, other family. I know you hate your disorder darling but there's nothing we can do about that" Dad says, pulling me into a hug.
"Want to go get some ice-cream?" Dad asks. I sniffle, wiping more tears off my face, but nod. He smiles slightly, and stands up. He grabs my hand and we go outside and get into the car. He drives to my favorite ice-cream place and parks. We order then sit at a table next to the window. I sigh and use my spoon to pick at my sundae.
"Is anything else bothering you, dear?" Dad asks.
"I just wish that I had a real friend. I have no friends. Most people are too afraid to talk to me, thinking I'm violent, and I wish that Aunt Lisa would trust and respect me a little more" I say quietly.
"I know. I will talk to Lisa" Dad says.
"But what if she gets mad at me for complaining about her?" I say.
"I will tell her that I've noticed she's been rude to you. She won't blame it on you, dear" Dad says. I sigh and take a few bits of my sundae.
"I promise you, things will get better" Dad convinces. I look up at him and slowly nod, adding a small smile. So, I feel a bit better and finish my vanilla and strawberry sundae.
"Dad?" I ask.
"Yes Maddie?" Dad asks.
"I want to go meet mom" I say so quiet he can barely hear me.
"Maddie...." he says slowly and calmly. "I don't think that's a good idea" Dad says.
"Okay" I say quietly.
"Your mom is unstable. She sorta just... Started going crazy after your younger sister was born. Something in her head, just snapped. And she went crazy. I can't really explain it. But I'm telling you, I don't think you would want to see her" Dad explains. I nod.
"I know I was only really little when she was still, normal. But, sometimes I miss her" I say quietly. Dad places his hand on mine.
"I miss her too darling. But it's best not to see her" Dad says. I nod. I stand up and hug him. Then he stands up and we walk to the exit. We walk up to the car, and someone bumps into me walking past.
"What the hell man?!" I yell harshly, I start walking towards him.
"Sorry miss," he says in a frantic. Dad hurries over to me and grabs my arm, opening the car door and leading me to sit down. He closes my door and walks around and gets in the car.
"He only bumped into you, Maddie, don't worry about it" Dad says sternly, turning on the ignition.
"I'm sorry" I say guiltily, looking down.
"I think your disorder is getting worse... Your getting mad at really small things" Dad says, putting on his seat-belt.
"Sorry" I say sadly. Dad pats my shoulder gently and drives us home. I go upstairs and hide in my room.