Just wait
There you go again.Off to find yourself and what you want,
Offering happiness does not satisfy,
Off kilter to what's safe and serene.
Here I am again.
Left to my own devices,
Left wondering why I am,
Left holding onto sanity.
Quick, concise, jabbing and jarring.
The cycle seems unending.
There is not much left,
Here is much to end,
But there is much to do.
It can not end here,
The happy ending needs to be reached,
The conclusions need to be met,
And you will find youself backtracking.
The doubt, the hate, the love
All swirling around and around
In a vat of toxic waste
Left outside for the birds to peck at.
Laughing to hide the darkness
Smiling to hide the despair
Friendly to hide the desires
And guilty to find what I want.
Stuck between a rock and window
Seeing through to the other side
Seeing the happiness reside
That does not involve you or I.
Desperation surmounted
You do not matter anymore
Even with the dwelling darkness
You are overshadowed
No you have been replaced
By desperation, despair or genuine
It does not matter
Either way it is still a window
The new you is stuck behind a pane
No stone nor pick can damage
So fragile, yet untouchable
Provocation my old devil.
The new you, not the same
Someone from the past
Someone familiar
Someone of close comfort
Whispering in my ear
"Break the glass"
"Break the glass"
"BREAK THE GLASS"
No
Humiliation is afoot
There is no guarantee
Nor solace in victory
Nor promise of glee
What there is however
Is instance of broken glass
Pieces scattered
And all because of I
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up
SHUT UP
This was a mistake
But how could it have been
Nothing has been acted upon
Its harmless
The new you has no knowledge
Nor resistance
Juxtaposing the confusion
Yet just posing juxtaposing
Sit
Listen
Wait
Watch the window
Wave
Smile
Wait
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