The Struggle For Love

Chapter 2.5

*Alex's POV*
        Stacie looks so elegant as she swims home. I can’t imagine why Mr. Johnson would pair me up with such a beautiful creature that is Stacie. I’m so thankful to him. If I could, I would thank him a million times. Anyways, I think Stacie realized we have a couple classes together. She would look around in each class until her eyes landed on me. Once they did, she would smile and I would smile back. Unfortunately, she would never talk to me or say hello. I felt like she was trying to avoid me at all costs. When school ended, she basically darted out the door. I couldn’t help, but think it was because of me.
        As soon as we are at Stacie’s house, she quickly swims to greet her waiting brother. Stacie picks him up and takes him inside, unknowing that I am watching them, leaving me curious as to what they are doing. I wonder what the inside of her house looks like. It’s not big like mine, but it’s still a house. To me, it doesn’t matter what is on the outside. All that matters is what you make of the inside. I bet she has pictures everywhere of her and her family. Even though I haven’t officially met any of her family members, I can tell Stacie is the type of person to want to remember every occasion whether it’s good or bad.
        A few minutes later, Stacie walks out of her house with her little brother. They begin playing all sorts of fun games. I wish I could join in. If I could, I definitely would. The only thing stopping me is the fact that I’m painfully shy. I don’t know Stacie’s brother, which is why I would probably stick to myself. He doesn’t know me, so he probably wouldn’t interact with me either. That’s why I haven’t spoken to Stacie anytime before today. Partly it’s due to the fact she is so gorgeous, but it’s mostly because I am afraid of what she might think of me. I’m afraid of people’s judgments forcing me to not speak to them at all. If I don’t talk to them, they can’t judge me so much.
        Stacie looks out-of-this-world cute playing with her little brother. I’ve heard her say the name Avery a couple times while I’ve been “keeping an eye” on her. I wonder if that’s his real name, or maybe it’s a nickname she gave him? You can tell Stacie really loves her brother. I wish I had siblings who I could enjoy playing with. Stacie’s lucky. She has three, even though I can tell she isn’t really close with one of her sisters. She isn’t that close with the other sister either. It’s really only her brother who she’s close to. It’s surely not Stacie’s choice. Stacie’s sisters seem like they would rather do anything, but play with Stacie.
        Shockingly, I haven’t seen Stacie’s mother at all in the past year while I have been watching her. Does Stacie not have a mother? Does she only live with her father? If I recall, I haven’t seen her father either. Why have I only seen Stacie and her siblings? Stacie’s so hardworking. Everyday I see her trying to take care of her siblings, who don‘t appreciate anything she does for them not including her brother. At least her brother appreciates it, even though he’s young.
        I really pity Stacie. She comes home from a hard day at school to take care of her bratty siblings. The only time I see her having fun is when she is playing with her brother for an hour or so. I never really see her go out to hang with anyone. The only person she does see is Marissa. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like Marissa cares too much about Stacie’s personal life. It’s always about her and what’s going on in her life. Marissa reminds me of Nick a lot. Those two would make a great couple I think. Like Marissa, Nick cares about Nick. He puts himself above everything else. Not that I mind considering I prefer to keep to myself. It’s just it can get a bit annoying. I would like some time to talk about me.
        “I’ll be back soon, I promise. I’ll try to hurry,” Stacie’s angelic voice says. I snap out of my trance. Why waste my time thinking about Marissa and Nick when I can be thinking about Stacie? Her little brother nods.
        “Okay, I wuv you,” he says frowning. In a way, he sounds really cute. I admire their bond as siblings. I’m extremely jealous of it.
        “I love you, too. Be a good boy for Mommy,” Stacie says pausing for a second. Her little brother nods. So she does have a mother? Or does her little brother call her Mom? You’ll ask her tomorrow, Alex. Calm down. You’re overworking yourself.
        “Okay. I will,” he says giving her a quick smile. Aw, touching. Wait, I’m becoming soft. I can’t become soft! What will my parents think? They’ve taught me better than this! But how can I not become a little soft with Stacie? They can’t tell me what to be, considering they haven’t met her.
        I watch as Stacie’s little brother swims inside the house. They must have a mother since Stacie always leaves him at home. It’s illegal to leave young children alone in the house. I’m sure Stacie’s not a law breaker. She seems like she does everything she’s told. Even if by some sort of huge surprise she was, I would probably still have a gigantic crush on her. Just then, Stacie swims past the bush I am in snapping me yet again out of my head. Stacie’s leaving! I must follow her. I’m guessing she’s going to pick up her siblings like she always does after school. Go catch up to her, Alex! Don’t let her get away!
        Stacie’s been slowly walking playing with her fingers. She tends to do this a lot when she is thinking. Stacie’s done it so much, it’s become a habit. I think she does it sort of as a stress reliever. Sometimes, I’ll even see her pinching her skin and causing pain. I don’t know if she knows she’s doing this, but I bet she doesn’t. Whenever she snaps out of her trance, she usually looks down at her hands surprised and shocked at the new things that lay there. At school, I can see little bruises and such on her hands. She must try to hide it because they’re not that easy to spot. Like most girls, she probably puts make up on it to cover them up.
        I’ve been following Stacie for a while now. I assume we’re close, but I don’t know exactly. I have been too busy staring at Stacie that I didn’t realize where we have been swimming. We could be lost for all I know. I haven’t been alone in this part of the city in a couple years. The last time I was here was when I went to middle school. Stacie must have realized we might be lost too because she begins to look around worriedly. After a few seconds, she must have figured out where we are since she begins swimming again. I follow closely behind, but not too close to where I can get caught.
        Soon, the bushes and objects I can hide behind fully, without being seen, start to diminish. I try to hide behind things that look as if they might hide me, but as soon as I get there, they only hide half my body or sometimes even a third. The only way I might not get caught is if I lie completely down on the ground behind an object. My mom would kill me if I was to come home with sand on my tail. She prefers me to be clean and spotless. I guess you could say I’m not a boy who was allowed to play outside much when I was little. Unless I want Stacie seeing me, I’ll have to take the punishment which most likely will be severe.
        I lie down on the ground behind a small, rusty, old boat waiting for Stacie to get far enough away for me to find a new hiding place. The sand feels super gross. I feel as if all sorts of fish and other creatures are on me. If I could see the look on mother’s face if she saw me. It would be priceless! But that still doesn’t help me forget about my situation. If only mother allowed me to play outside like other children, I wouldn’t be like this. I might actually be good at sports. I might enjoy getting dirty. I might be as athletic as Stacie.
        Once I think she is far enough away, I get up from the horrid ground. I wipe away the sand off my precious green tail. The things I do for love. Just then, I hear a little shriek. I look up at Stacie to see her swimming speedily away. Hopefully, she didn’t see me. I hope she just saw my figure or something. I mean it is pretty dark around here. It couldn’t of happen, could it? If she did see me, my life is over. I was finally starting to get to know her better. She was getting to know me better. Stacie was learning I wasn’t such a bad guy. Now, it’s all down the drain. You really screwed up this time, Alex.