The Voices

Abuse And Pain Is Not The Answer

When I wake up I see Xander sitting in a chair...actually I’m in a chair too...only I’ve been strapped to it. What happened?
“He pushed you down the stairs after you basically told him what you knew.” Anger whispers
What? He wouldn’t do that...I was just mad. I wasn’t going to leave.
“Will you not talk to yourself like that?” Xander snaps
“Why can’t I talk to myself. I’m finding out new stuff everyday.” I whisper
"Oh? What, my dear, are you learning everyday” He says menacingly
“How much of a liar you are. How quickly you would cheat on somebody because they wouldn’t have sex with you. You know. The quick to learn stuff. I’ve only learned just today how abusive you are.” I say
Suddenly I feel a sharp pain in the side of my face. HE SLAPPED ME! HE FREAKING SLAPPED ME!
“Shut up or else” He shouts
“Or else what? What else can you do to me? You’ve already broken my heart. Anger won’t  let you break me.” I shout back
“I will kill you with my bare hands.”
I sit there shocked. How dare he? He really thinks that he would get away with killing me?
“Why don’t you just torture me and make me regret ever saving your life like you’ve already done.”
“Because I can’t, I can’t hurt you more than I already have.” He whispers. Then to my horror he starts crying.
“Let me out you jerk and let me comfort you” I say sharply
When he unties me, I wrap my arms around his neck and let him sob into my shoulder. “Shhh, it’s okay. Don’t worry. I won’t leave you” I say soothingly
“No it’s not. I told her, after you slammed your door that I loved you. I have fallen totally and completely in love with you. She was pissed and told me that you had probably heard and saw everything. Then when you stormed down the stairs...I...I just lost it. I then kept going. I tied you to the chair and waited for you to wake up. When you said that I had broken your heart I broke. I realized that I love you. You don’t know much about the world because you grew up at the asylum. I’m so sorry.” He sobs.
Pain, Anger how did this work? Why did he break down?
“Because of love. Like we said at the very beginning, we are with every human being. No matter their age. He broke down because he loves you.” Pain says, “Echo, he probably fell when you first met him.”
But why? Why Did he fall in love with me? I’m nothing if not a freak. I’m not sure what I really look like. I probably look ugly. I look at his amazing green eyes and glance at his lips. Those amazing soft lips that can entrance mine with just one kiss. I blink and pull away from the hug.
“I’m sorry it’s been so rough between us” I say “But you can’t keep hitting me or shoving me down staircases.”
“I know...I know and I’m sorry.” He whispers
I kiss him on the head and stand up. “I’m going to make some food...okay?”
As I walk to the kitchen I hear a muffled “Okay”. When I start looking around at the food containers I find something simple. When I finish cooking it, I put the food onto two plates and take it into the living room to find Xander asleep. I smile and eat my portion before wrapping his in a container and going to my room, and curling up in my bed to go to sleep.