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Listening to authors cackling while they kill and/or torture everyone you care about
on August 15, 2018
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(Watching the Ninja LEGO Movie)
Lloyd: Green is the color of life, etc.
My Sister: It's also the color of MONEY
Lloyd: Green is the color of life, etc.
My Sister: It's also the color of MONEY
on August 07, 2018
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Me: *shows sister drawing*
Sister: Cool, who is it?
Me: No one, it's just a cute bunny girl.
Sister: *haunting whisper* Stalker
Me: When have I ever stalked a bunny girl?!
Sister: Cool, who is it?
Me: No one, it's just a cute bunny girl.
Sister: *haunting whisper* Stalker
Me: When have I ever stalked a bunny girl?!
on August 06, 2018
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on August 05, 2018
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Mom: You're phone's running out of battery. You should plug it in
Me: Nah
Mom: There's a charger right there.
Me: Too lazy to plug it in. I only do it when I'm down to 5%
Mom: Buckle up, Kiki
Me: Nah
Mom: There's a charger right there.
Me: Too lazy to plug it in. I only do it when I'm down to 5%
Mom: Buckle up, Kiki
on August 05, 2018
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Just saying, but if it's "true love," shouldn't you be able to tell when they are being impersonated by an entirely different person disguised as them? JUST SAYING...
on August 04, 2018
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on August 03, 2018
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The_Watcher uploaded a photo
My sister says "that will be me and [her] boyfriend." Should I be worried?
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on August 02, 2018
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Take (dis)comfort in the fact that, somewhere in the world, there is one person (or many, for that matter) who will always be there to offend you with every word they speak so much that it physically hurts, and that, while you may never meet them in person, the internet is there to make sure you encounter them daily.
on August 02, 2018
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There are two types of people (watching the Hunger Games):
1) Awh, that poor kid :'(
2) Lol Cato looks like a bear rn
1) Awh, that poor kid :'(
2) Lol Cato looks like a bear rn
on July 31, 2018
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"You're doing it right when you know you're doing it wrong."
- My sister
- My sister
on July 28, 2018
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on July 22, 2018
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Me: I'm going upstairs *starts going upstairs*
Sister: Only if you can find me
Me: *Looks at her*
Sister: *sits in creepy pose on the toilet* Hi.
Me: *creeped out* *turns aroundnd and starts running upstairs*
Me: *halfway upstairs* *looks back*
(Sister is chasing me) See More
Me: *screams*
Sister: *screams*
Mom: *screams*
Sister: Only if you can find me
Me: *Looks at her*
Sister: *sits in creepy pose on the toilet* Hi.
Me: *creeped out* *turns aroundnd and starts running upstairs*
Me: *halfway upstairs* *looks back*
(Sister is chasing me) See More
Me: *screams*
Sister: *screams*
Mom: *screams*
on July 20, 2018
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My sister: *trying to make me laugh* Grandma upside down. Shhe's behind you!
Me: what?!?? *slowly turns around*
Me: what?!?? *slowly turns around*
on July 18, 2018
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Dad: *using sink*
Me: *tries to show Dad funny meme* Look at this
Dad: *grabs phone*
Me: *sarcastic* Oh great, just use your wet hands. Yep, that's fine
Dad: *looks at me while grabing glass of water and tiping it over my phone*
Me: *tries to show Dad funny meme* Look at this
Dad: *grabs phone*
Me: *sarcastic* Oh great, just use your wet hands. Yep, that's fine
Dad: *looks at me while grabing glass of water and tiping it over my phone*
on July 18, 2018
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Does this thing always say I'm active? Because I'm getting suspicious....
Seriously, does it?
Seriously, does it?
on July 18, 2018
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*car parked outside driveway*
*Family goes in house*
Me: Wait! Don't LEAVE me out here!
Dad: *stops outside door*
Me: *getting out if car* *sarcastic* Actually, no, it's fine, you can just leave me outside in the dark
Dad: You have a flashlight (my phone flashlight was on)
Me: Just like every horror game protagonist.
*Family goes in house*
Me: Wait! Don't LEAVE me out here!
Dad: *stops outside door*
Me: *getting out if car* *sarcastic* Actually, no, it's fine, you can just leave me outside in the dark
Dad: You have a flashlight (my phone flashlight was on)
Me: Just like every horror game protagonist.
on July 18, 2018
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on July 17, 2018