so uh im just ognna overshare/vent
OH AND TW FOR S/H, @BUSE, TH3RAPY, S1ICIDAL BEHAVIOR AND E@TING
message i sent to my friend yesterday:
"I'm sick. I woke up early. School. Its 845am and I have gym at 905am. The wRmups sick. Our school nurse is creepy. Overthinking. Unhealthy life style that I can't change. Probably being emotionally abused by my own family. Wanting to fcking die but can't tell anyone about it and therapists lost my trust. Self tucking harm that I've given See More up trying to stop. Loss of appetite. Getting judged. Feeling weak. Life.
Oh let's not forget almost crying but literally can't cry because if you do people will see you weaker than you already are so learning to bottle emotions and lock the. Bottle"
and apparently that's not normal but it's what i've been taught by literally everyone including my friends??
OH AND TW FOR S/H, @BUSE, TH3RAPY, S1ICIDAL BEHAVIOR AND E@TING
message i sent to my friend yesterday:
"I'm sick. I woke up early. School. Its 845am and I have gym at 905am. The wRmups sick. Our school nurse is creepy. Overthinking. Unhealthy life style that I can't change. Probably being emotionally abused by my own family. Wanting to fcking die but can't tell anyone about it and therapists lost my trust. Self tucking harm that I've given See More up trying to stop. Loss of appetite. Getting judged. Feeling weak. Life.
Oh let's not forget almost crying but literally can't cry because if you do people will see you weaker than you already are so learning to bottle emotions and lock the. Bottle"
and apparently that's not normal but it's what i've been taught by literally everyone including my friends??
on October 26, 2021
so my school switched out any days like before break and stuff from not having school to having school remote/online-
yes, i like online school. But what I like even better? no school
yes, i like online school. But what I like even better? no school
Agreed, but I do prefer in person school more cause I hate my working environment from home
on October 26, 2021
on October 26, 2021
Begel — Today at 9:43 PM
pf
so you know how on friday it wa raining in the morning
and people usually wear coats and hoods to block the rain
and we have to walk sometimes a certain distance to get to our bus stop
and sometimes the bus stop doesn't have shelter?
and walking in the rain gets someone sick? See More
so my dumb @ss won't be coming to school tomorrow
nervous laughter
pf
so you know how on friday it wa raining in the morning
and people usually wear coats and hoods to block the rain
and we have to walk sometimes a certain distance to get to our bus stop
and sometimes the bus stop doesn't have shelter?
and walking in the rain gets someone sick? See More
so my dumb @ss won't be coming to school tomorrow
nervous laughter
on October 26, 2021
as much as i love staying home from school, i dread of being sick
on October 26, 2021
BEGEL CULT ANYONE
(not an actual cult ykyk)
(not an actual cult ykyk)
on October 26, 2021
on October 26, 2021
basically my life on insta:
*someone leaves hate comment*
me: *likes it or just agrees, if people start attacking delete the persons comment*
*someone leaves hate comment*
me: *likes it or just agrees, if people start attacking delete the persons comment*
on October 25, 2021
*when you got a new device and use a new email but something you're signing up for says you've already created too many accs for the device*
on October 25, 2021
one of the happiest things that can happen as a closeted transgender with transphobic/unsupportive parents and supportive gf/bf/friends:
this happened to me
but first explanation
me and my gf used to rp as *us*, like using our deadname and personalities so basically irl us with imaginative powers
i scrolled up to our first rp and here's a conversation part
me-
NOT ME SCROLLING ALL THE WAY TO THE BEGINING See More
gf-
Wtf
me-
When im bored im bored ok
gf-
Who tf is *deadname*?
me-
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
gf-
Anyway wanna continue rp?
no acknowledgement of a deadname :D
this happened to me
but first explanation
me and my gf used to rp as *us*, like using our deadname and personalities so basically irl us with imaginative powers
i scrolled up to our first rp and here's a conversation part
me-
NOT ME SCROLLING ALL THE WAY TO THE BEGINING See More
gf-
Wtf
me-
When im bored im bored ok
gf-
Who tf is *deadname*?
me-
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
gf-
Anyway wanna continue rp?
no acknowledgement of a deadname :D
on October 24, 2021
nobody:
what my sibling does in their free time:
"Samantha is a dinasour with no imagination, i pulled out my shotgun and shot her with no hesitation~~~"
samantha is my sibling's toxic ex-friend btw so no offense to any other samantha's on here
what my sibling does in their free time:
"Samantha is a dinasour with no imagination, i pulled out my shotgun and shot her with no hesitation~~~"
samantha is my sibling's toxic ex-friend btw so no offense to any other samantha's on here
on October 24, 2021
got a new phone :')
on October 23, 2021
never going to a school dance/hangout dressed as dream again
"dream"
"dweam"
"dnf confirmed??"
"IT'S DREAM"
*someone steals mask and runs away*
good things - See More
*chases my bff/gf dressed as george*
*found a squad of cosplayer friends/dsmp dressed people*
*gf proposed to me with a ring pop*/hj
aand someone tried to make me and my gf kiss on the lips-
"dream"
"dweam"
"dnf confirmed??"
"IT'S DREAM"
*someone steals mask and runs away*
good things - See More
*chases my bff/gf dressed as george*
*found a squad of cosplayer friends/dsmp dressed people*
*gf proposed to me with a ring pop*/hj
aand someone tried to make me and my gf kiss on the lips-
on October 23, 2021
*listening to playlist and girl in red plays as homophobic parents come upstairs but youre such a music geek you know you literally can't press pause in the middle of song so you start panicking and hoping your parents just mind your business*
on October 23, 2021
so uh idk when anyone will hear from me so goodbye for now i'm taking a break and hopefully short one
on October 21, 2021
Well todays fun
Didnt ear lunch
Didnt eat breakfast
Wouldve passed out at gym
Dont know what to be for our halloween dance because 2 partner outfits but that one person has no clue if they can be the character
Overthinking
Lack of communication with an s/o See More
Nor having anyone to vent to
Depression
And relapsing
Didnt ear lunch
Didnt eat breakfast
Wouldve passed out at gym
Dont know what to be for our halloween dance because 2 partner outfits but that one person has no clue if they can be the character
Overthinking
Lack of communication with an s/o See More
Nor having anyone to vent to
Depression
And relapsing
on October 21, 2021
question i wanna see which people think is better
A- therapist that tells "important" things to parents although said everything only stays between us two(e.g. telling therapist you almost killed someone out of anger and wanted it kept secret from your parents but they tell anyways)
B- "your secret is safe with me, this stays between us only" and sticks with that no matter, unless super important like diagnosis stuff
A- therapist that tells "important" things to parents although said everything only stays between us two(e.g. telling therapist you almost killed someone out of anger and wanted it kept secret from your parents but they tell anyways)
B- "your secret is safe with me, this stays between us only" and sticks with that no matter, unless super important like diagnosis stuff
Well actually the therapist will keep everything i between you 2 unless you show suicidal tendencies or murderous tendencies and they think you might hurt someone. It is part of their contract. So even though you want B, they cannot give you B if you say something like that. So just lie to them and it will be easier on everyone.
on October 21, 2021
on October 21, 2021
?The?Begel?Cult?
Check out the ?The?Begel?Cult? community on Discord - hang out with 8 other members and enjoy free voice and text chat.
on October 20, 2021
Over time it will become a habit, and it can help you be more positive about, well, everything. And that in turn will be an extra layer of protection in the long run.
Don't let many thoughts slip put. If you find a negative one, shut it down, See More replace it. Don't think about it again if you can help it.
If you need help, or someone to talk to, or advice pm me. If something didn't help talk to me and I'll try to give you more advice
I hope you feel better soon, your a great friend!
3/3
B) writing- have like a private notebook you can use to write your problems away. Tell it all your secrets, fears, pains, and what caused them. Like a diary but for issues.
And another cool thing is if See More you have a piece of paper and you fill it with worries then rip up the paper or trash it it can help make you feel better
6. Toxic friends are a no go. They are everywhere, they get attracted to you, but if you see them being toxic try to leave or talk to them about it. If you cant leave distance yourself. They will only bring you down
7. I suggest doing this, it works. When you think in your mind, consciencly look for negative thoughts. If you find one, stop yourself and replace it with a positive one. Regardless if you believe it's true or not. Try to do this everytime you have a negative thought about yourself or your life.
2/3
1. Try to get enough sleep. It can help with mental issues and productivity and makes you feel better
2. Try to get help, tell people about your family. I know it'll be hard, and you won't want to, but find someone you really trust who is an adult.
3. For loss of appetite Try to add in a bit more food every day into your meals. It can make See More all the difference. It doesn't have to be much, but as long as you add more in steadily it will work
4. Everyone judges you, that's a fact. And everyone has their weaknesses. And thus will sound stereotypical but don't think about what others think of you. Imagine what they will be in 50, 60 years looking back on their lives. They will probably regret the decisions they have done to judge others.
5. Locking up emotions can end up destroying them, and I can see that you don't really have a good vent source, so here's a few techniques I used that can help with bottled emotions-
1/3